Reflections from a painful experience
This week I became very ill, very quickly. I developed Repetitive Strain Injury in my right shoulder... the pain was very intense and spread right down to my middle finger on my right hand. It was even more intense in the night and my shoulder seemed to lock in an unhealthy, hunched position. OH Such Agony! I couldn't find any position that alleviated the pain. It was like a small, incredibly cold monster had got inside my right arm and was gnawing at the bone with very sharp teeth... Sometimes the pain would make me feel faint and break out in a cold sweat and it was hard to focus on anything other than the pain....
But gradually as the pain killers assisted and my poor muscles relaxed just a little bit, I prayed and reflected on how much worse Jesus must have felt on the cross... how he was never angry even during such intense suffering ... how he even made provision for his Mother, Mary... surely this shows us just how incredible our Lord is.
I also reflected on other things...
How easily I took my arm for granted when it had a full range of motion. How much more sympathy I wished I had shown in the past to others who were limping... with their bodies that were also in pain.
Also how much I wished I'd not taken Church and Prayer and talking to God for granted... prayer is a whole different experience when one is trying to focus through a haze of pain signals being sent into the mind... it is very hard to focus.
(Image from a small Home Altar in my house)
But I also noticed something in my pain that I noticed some years ago whilst suffering intense toothache... staring at a Crucifix can alleviate pain... I only seem to be able to do this for a second... probably down to my lack of faith and my own human failings... but just for that second, I was lifted out of the pain.
The experience has given me so much to be grateful for... the kind prayers of Priests and Friends ... the practically minded paramedic who had seen it all before and knew which muscles I had strained and what to do next... also, my close family, helping me out... I am very grateful.
I have also learnt a lot about the dangers of over-doing things and I have ordered an Artist's Mahl Stick to help my right hand and arm when I am painting... so it has been a very big lesson for me.
But gradually as the pain killers assisted and my poor muscles relaxed just a little bit, I prayed and reflected on how much worse Jesus must have felt on the cross... how he was never angry even during such intense suffering ... how he even made provision for his Mother, Mary... surely this shows us just how incredible our Lord is.
I also reflected on other things...
How easily I took my arm for granted when it had a full range of motion. How much more sympathy I wished I had shown in the past to others who were limping... with their bodies that were also in pain.
Also how much I wished I'd not taken Church and Prayer and talking to God for granted... prayer is a whole different experience when one is trying to focus through a haze of pain signals being sent into the mind... it is very hard to focus.
(Image from a small Home Altar in my house)
But I also noticed something in my pain that I noticed some years ago whilst suffering intense toothache... staring at a Crucifix can alleviate pain... I only seem to be able to do this for a second... probably down to my lack of faith and my own human failings... but just for that second, I was lifted out of the pain.
The experience has given me so much to be grateful for... the kind prayers of Priests and Friends ... the practically minded paramedic who had seen it all before and knew which muscles I had strained and what to do next... also, my close family, helping me out... I am very grateful.
I have also learnt a lot about the dangers of over-doing things and I have ordered an Artist's Mahl Stick to help my right hand and arm when I am painting... so it has been a very big lesson for me.
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